Cookie Notice It's impossible for things to be perfect. Thats because I eat Doritos chips too loudly. I dont tell you how to live your life, dont tell me how to live mine thanks. Not Bad. On the plus side, a little humor injected into someones day can have a positive impact on their otherwise average day! Let them know that you're itching to go on a date. Do I look like someone whos into cheesy things like romantic relationships?! On a scale of one to punching someone in the face, I am at 7.5. If this doesn't get a response, it's sure to get a laugh. There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. If you're taking a vacation and staying home, your clients or coworkers may still expect you to pop into the office and answer their emails. This one kills me! 27. If corporate email language won't do it, nothing will. This means that when they get super excited, it can cause their heart to beat too fast, which causes death. Everyone has a different sense of humor. It would be easy to answer that question with a simple "I'm fine, thank you.". Why not laugh about it and allow it to bring us closer together? I could never tell when someones flirting with me or if theyre just being nice. I dont know where you got your looks, but I hope you kept the receipt. Martin holds a Masters degree in Finance and International Business. . I think it's a great response when you're possibly feeling cranky. Damn, now why didnt you think of it earlier?! Is It A Bad Idea To Lose My Virginity To An Old Crush? He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Me being single is just a conspiracy! 78. (This line came from the cartoon show. Because I prefer the company of dogs/cats rather than humans. *Siri activates front camera*. Just look what happened there! My guardian angel be like 2. She works wit more, Harini Natarajan , Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner, Expertise: Relationships, Beauty & Lifestyle, Health & Wellness, As Head Of Content Operations, Harini sets the tone and editorial direction for StyleCraze to deliver engaging, interesting, and authentic content revolving around women's health, wellness, and beauty more. [*clap your hands*]. Youre like Monday: no one likes you. Humans are sophisticated beings, but we are also creatures of habit who say one thing while we mean something else. Plotting how Im going to take over the world. Funny responses to "How are you?" Photo courtesy of Canva. I was hoping you would be able to tell me that. Hey, whered you get that nose? Furthermore, he has teaching experience from Aarhus University. 10. "If at first, you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.". Thats no excuse for treating someone like they dont exist, especially since 85% of participants said theyd rather be told upfront that someones not feeling it. Average, I think, that sounds about right. Its more likely that theyre just being a bad friend. 65. 88. [Read: How to be funny and make someone laugh over text just by being YOU]. Everyone knows a happy dog wags his tail, so if you're feeling happy and joyful, this would be a good response to give to someone asking how you're doing because it's clever and unique. When a date's playing it hot and cold or you haven't heard from your crush in weeks, these witty ghosting responses will help you clear the air and your mind. As Head Of Content Operations, Harini sets the tone and editorial direction for StyleCraze to deliver engaging, interesting, and authentic content revolving around women's health, wellness, and beauty. They might even steal it to use in the future. Just standing here waiting for stupid questions I guess. I wrote him a cheque for it, post-dated of course. Chic Murray (comedian), When I die, I hope to go to heaven, whatever the hell that is. Ayn Rand (author), The only difference between death and taxes is that death doesnt get worse every time congress meets. Will Rogers (actor), "My grandmother was a very tough woman. What do you say when people ask you that? Even if life is rough, be happy that you're still alive. Well, I'm old enough to beat you in a marathon. Could be payday. Then you die. Hopefully he'll compliment you right back. No, they're prison pants. (Act suspicious of everything and everyone!). If you were twice as smart as you are now, youd be stupid. OK, so now at least you should have some idea of how to respond if your ex texts you out of the blue. At minding my own business? For more information, please see our If you are in a coma, then that is a valid excuse for not texting back. If you want, Ill give you a discount, baby. A real low-life. Looking for funny responses to everyday questions? Funny give back answer for who are your ex boyfriends? But, whats the likelihood of that happening? The only way youll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chickens butt and wait. The following two tabs change content below. Alternatively, you can let them know you are doing well but still need time to process your emotions. Perhaps you said something as egregious as Hey. Boom. Have you met food? When you're mad, but don't want to ruin your impression, this is a nice way to reply to your crush or match. But it does help if you know your audience when responding to someone. I just woke up like that one day. The only thing offending me right now is your face. [Read: How to learn to be witty and win over everyone in the room]. It's all about confidence. Keep calm and be awesome. But Ive also had better. 5. I have a gold watch that belonged to him. Today, well look at 30 ways you can respond to a late message or reply. One common excuse that people come up with when they take a while to reply is Im bad at replying. Here are 28 of the best ghosting responses to send someone whos been ignoring you. Theres this one time when a cute guy/gal asked me if I have a boyfriend/girlfriend and I said yes because I didnt hear the question. I play hard to get even if nobody is trying to get me. I hear good things; however, you should never listen to rumors. How do you get it to curl out of your nostrils like that? Like for your friends and close ones, here are some witty responses and replies to make them laugh, because they know exactly how you're doing and ask you as par of formality. Everyone wants me, but no one dares! TikTok video from Mark Winston (@markwinstonbball): "Are you still alive? Were already married, remember?! Truth is, we all have ugly experiences with our past lovers. *wink*. After all, every single day that you're still alive is a good day overall. Maybe because I like pineapples on my pizza? Are you serious? You can fire back with a witty and flirty response. These comebacks are best for those situations where you dont just want to insult someoneyou want to own the room. 91. 1. My bad, its just your mouth. Funny Response to "What Are You Doing?" "I cry." Humor is about creating surprises. Id rather have a doughnut on my finger than a real ring. Are you going to help me have a good day? Sort of. You can put your foot in your mouth and your head up your ass at the same time! Perfect for that BRB, shower text that they never BRBd to. 2 I ask for your birth chart one time, and suddenly, I'm a mind-reading witch that knows what you're thinking. The government? 13. Copyright 2011 - 2023 IncNut Stylecraze Private Limited. 9. funny response to are you still alive. 45. Don't Push It Too Far. Why is it OK for you to be an idiot, but not OK for me to point it out? I havent met the right one yet. Just Smile And Nod 2. It takes a specific kind of person to ghost someone its really not that hard to send a quick Im not interested text but rest assured, they exist. I am not looking for anyone, and neither is anyone looking for me. 2 I'm Still on the Right Side of the Grass As long as you're still breathing, you can use this reply. There is no gray area (<brain matter joke): either you are brain-dead or you are not. How do you think that I am doing? Read more about Martin here. Living the dream! Well, Im married to our lord and savior, Jesus Christ. They really care for you, and you better value their presence well. 12. "If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. "Yeah, you're three years late. Hi! Here are 55 funny coronavirus memes that will make you LOL. If youre still single, some people will ask you for a reason or explanation, in one way or another. 1. Your email address will not be published. I cant really complain, but I will still try. Figuring out how to respond to a ghoster is all a matter of accepting whats done. You don't need to miss them, because you are willing to travel to them, and kiss them. But sometimes sending a little message before excommunication can give you the confidence boost you need to dropkick them from your mind for forever. Scientists say the universe is made up of electrons, protons, and neutrons. Who knows, maybe you can steer a conversation in a more intriguing path. What's your sign? Rather than kicking yourself later when you think of something clever you should have said, keep a few witty insults and comebacks at the ready, just in case. Could Be Payday. I cant complain, not that anyone listens anyway. So the next time someone asks you why you're still. Great, but I should warn you that I am totally biased. Wait, are you my Superman/Wonder Woman? However, I dont recall anything about morons. 4. *sips wine/tea*. 3. There is not always a need to be so funny, witty, or clever. I love you. I dont chase them just to satisfy my sexual desires. You don't need to say it. June 14, 2022; pros and cons of stem cell therapy for knees . Like seriously, you hoped for him to be run over by a truck or something. If you are, then maybe were meant to be! I dont feel that great, but look! If you're going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty. 4. But, because they have taken so long to reply, you have grown older and wiser. I agree, thanks for sharing. 6. Physically? Are you flirting with me right now? Before you complain about anything, be thankful for your life and the things that are still going well.". 101. Im in a loving, committed relationship with my bed. If you knock on my hearts door, I might let you in. You may join me, though. Moving in with Roommates? funny response to are you still alive. You don't want to give the same, bland answer all the time. - Anonymous. Thomas Andrew Lehrer (/ l r r /; born April 9, 1928) is an American musician, singer-songwriter, satirist, and mathematician, who later taught mathematics and musical theater.He recorded pithy and humorous songs that became popular in the 1950s and 1960s. but it's just so blunt and funny. Ive seen your kind before but last time, I had to pay admission. Overwatch 2 Friendly Reminder To Leave a LIKE & SUBSCRIBE, ThanksJoin this channel to get access to perks:https://www.youtube.com/cha. Haha basically a sassy way to say, "I'm still alive." Are you going to marry me? 2. Funny Answers to How Are You Doing? 56. If someone clearly doesnt want to talk to you, the best thing to do is not talk to them. Rita Rudner (comedian), "When I die, I want my body to be donated for research, but more specifically, to a scientist who is working on bringing dead bodies back to life." Of course, you don't want to brag, which is why this funny line is useful. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. This one is funny when you havent said anything. Doing fairly well, unless you have some contagious disease and are about to infect me . 8. Shane from The L Word? I mean, no matter how amazing our lives are, there's always something to complain about. Whether my maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter. Winston Churchill (politician), At a formal dinner party, the person nearest to death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. George Carlin (comedian), Dont send me flowers when Im dead. 30. I dont follow boys/girls because theyre not my passion. Im quite certain that Im single because I didnt forward those chain messages stating: forward this to 10 people and you will meet the love of your life in 10 days, or else you suffer bad luck in the past. Otherwise, how are people going to get the message that you dont want to keep answering the same questions with the same half-hearted answers? Getting into a romantic relationship with someone may seem like a good idea, but so was getting into Titanic. Through humorous musings about Scalia's . Im sorry I hurt your feelings. Aeldrion 5 yr. ago. 26. . Because if you are, youre doing it right. Elon Musk targets Bernie Sanders over tax tweet: 'I keep forgetting that you're still alive' The Twitter spat was in response to Sanders' demand that "the extremely wealthy pay their fair share." See more ideas about maxine, bones funny, funny quotes. Taco Tuesday is pressure enough, I tell you! But, compared to messaging, pigeons are much slower. 66. Martin has been featured as an expert in communication and teaching on Forbes and Shopify. 35. Because your ass is out of this world! Thats because I only enjoy long, romantic walks to the fridge. Maybe they had a giant project at work and lost contact with all their friends and loved ones. Some people are going to find your witty responses funny, and some people arent. You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the. For example, if it is a friend, you can be funny or witty. [Read: 20 things you MUST know to master a dry sense of humor]. Listen, maybe your crush really did lose their phone. Im sorry. Norman Wisdom (comedian), "I have lost friends, some by death, others through their sheer inability to cross the street." This is another funny response that you can use to say that you did a little something different this morning. Still, the ghosters ghost on. 15. This way, youre insulting themand they just might be dumb enough not to notice. Why dont you tell me, you seem to have a pretty good view from there. 58. 82. 9. "Alright. Stop asking me why Im single! Sort: Relevant Newest # living # seth meyers # im here # its me # lnsm # tired # dead # shot # arrows # loser # hello # hi # hey # tap # listen # alive # pearl jam # eddie vedder # i'm good # i'm ok #fyp #basketball #viral #fyp #viralvideo #funny #comedy". I am really just trying hard to avoid ambiguous questions at this moment. And it's time for me to make my escape. Maybe you can Google it. If I was doing any better, I would hire you to enjoy it with me. Hemali is an ICF-Certified ACC Level Life Coach with 3 years of experience in relationship, marriage, and grief coaching. (This is an awesome response if you want to fluster them and catch them off-guard) So much better now that you are with me. Nevertheless, life must go on, and sometimes you just have to go with the flow, as they sayeven if you don't want to discuss your relationship status! If its better than yours Ill chalk it up as a win. Good luck feel free to drop me a comment below if you have any funny responses I should add to the list, and do let me know if you get any memorable responses back. I always yawn when Im interested. So, ditch the mechanical responses and adopt the witty and fun replies to keep the conversations exciting! But, if they were, it would be a valid reason for them taking so long to reply. That's impossible. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience. Its a shame you cant Photoshop your personality. Not. Here's a 13-second video explaining how Jennifer Lawrence uses this Surprise Theory: #maudit # peter o'toole # happy birthdayyy # im glad youre still alive. Im too expensive. (Explained). But, you should know that, I don't like you, already. Well, I have to go to work so Ill try and make the best of it. Haha use this humorous response to make someone laugh-you never know, you just might brighten their day. This is one of those worst epic responses to I love you makes us feel for the poor love-struck fellow. 20 Warning Signs You Are In A Codependent 20 Warning Signs You Are In A Codependent Relationship. Youre not going to use the same response to your dad as you would your best friend, right? The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers to this website may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. original sound - Tyren Sams. 71. By acting as though they are replying too fast, you highlight the fact that they are replying too slow. 2. Im a little busy right now, but Id love the chance to ignore you some other time. Your email address will not be published. [Read: 30 foolproof pickup lines and 10 you should never ever use]. Unlikely, but worth a shot. If you like me, send them while Im alive. Brian Clough (football team manager), I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure. Clarence Darrow (lawyer), Millions long for immortality who dont know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon. Susan Ertz (author), In this world, nothing can be certain, except death and taxes. Benjamin Franklin (inventor), Life is hard. On Mars, cell phone reception might not be too good. If someone is going to ask you the same old everyday questions, I dont think Im being unreasonable when I say theyre probably just going through the motions and not really interested in your answer. Still with us. Did someone leave your cage open? You may have noticed that I take a step back when we talk. 2023 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. Do you really care? Arthur lived a short life, but none could doubt that it was a good one. Come on, now I want you to whisper that question slowly to my ear. It is a humorous way of saying they have not heard from you in a while. I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. Because nowadays, the industry prefers singles over albums. If receiving a text from your ex elicits strong negative feelings, it is best not to respond. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. Nevertheless, it can be a great approach to start a lively discussion! I see youve chosen this time to humiliate yourself in public. No, I'm Finnish. That will ensure there will be at least one man who will regret my death. Heinrich Heine (author), Fear of death increases in exact proportion to increase in wealth. Ernest Hemingway (author), Its funny the way most people love the dead. Should I consider that a marriage proposal from you? 25. This one is a bit depressing, which is why you should watch when you use it. 77. The following responses dont require wit, but do require a funny bone. I text the same message ' are you alive' when I haven't heard from them in a while. If laughter is the best medicine, your face must be curing the world. Things You Should Know about Birth Control Pills 62 Beautiful Makeup Inspos for Girls Who Are Not Afraid to Play with Color "Like an echo asking a shadow to dance on a mirage, this one is even funnier when an ugly person says, My friend always says "gooder". I'm fine. If this doesnt cause them to reply, then maybe you should rethink your friendship with this person. Hence, you may need to put in some effort to keep the conversation flowing. If I wanted to commit suicide, Id climb your ego and jump to your IQ level. I laugh at my own jokes before I finish them. Depends who you ask, if you ask me, it was fine. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); Some Funny Responses to Everyday Questions. How do you want me to be? Why would you talk to someone at their convenience when they wouldnt speak to you when you needed them.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_2',106,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3','ezslot_3',106,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-medrectangle-3-0_1');.medrectangle-3-multi-106{border:none!important;display:block!important;float:none!important;line-height:0;margin-bottom:7px!important;margin-left:auto!important;margin-right:auto!important;margin-top:7px!important;max-width:100%!important;min-height:50px;padding:0;text-align:center!important}. 51. I havent found anyone who matches my kinks yet. Photo by Glenna Rankin on reshot 02 "It has been a while since I've heard from you, and at this point, I'm over it." A truly stinging sarcastic response to I love you. Youre not as bad as everyone says. I'm not saying I hate you, what I'm saying is that you are literally the Monday of my life. Break the cycle, rise above, focus on science! Id smack you, but that would be animal abuse. The friendly ghost would never leave you hanging. 1. Theyre incapacitated when it comes to sending a simple text, yet they can Insta their whole day. via: Pexels / George Pak. Now you can be! Usually, people live and learn. How impressive! Do you want the short or the detailed version? Its too small to be out there all alone. To text, most of us need our thumbs. Theyre not replying to you, but theyre posting on Twitter. Relationships, Marriage, Couples, Grief, Life Coaching, Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner, Relationships, Beauty & Lifestyle, Health & Wellness, Infographic: Tips To Continue A Conversation After Responding To How Are You. I hated you the moment I met you, and I still hate you. You grow on peoplebut then again, so does cancer. I'm not Hal and we're not in space. Maybe because I have a Ph.D. in impatience. 2023 The Arena Media Brands, LLC and respective content providers on this website. It depends on what or who I compare myself to. Because a single-storey is much more economical than a double-storey. upstart loan login; jim bell siloam mission salary; . Feeling confident? 24. Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. . Youre supposed to think that theyre so busy being cool that they dont have time for you. The truth is, if you really want to get him back, you should follow the steps outlined here..
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